YouTube - Johnny Knoxville, Eddie Barbanell and the R-word

This has absolutely nothing to do with divorce or family law. It's just a good video.

YouTube - Johnny Knoxville, Eddie Barbanell and the R-word

Relgion, Divorce...and Jail Time?

It's commonplace to hear of a parent being held in contempt of court and being sentenced to a period of jail time for failing to pay child support or other financial obligations. And once in a while I've seen a Judge send a parent to jail for other violations of court Orders (failing to obtain insurance, visitation abuse, etc). But sending a parent to jail for taking a child to church? This was a new one for me, but apparently Cook County Judge Ed Jordan will be faced with this very decision on March 3rd. The case is that of Joseph Reyes, who is currently embroiled in divorce proceedings in Cook County. He and his wife have a daughter, and religion has become a topic in their bitter custody battle; Judge Jordan entered an order restraining Mr. Reyes from "exposing his daughter to any other religion than the Jewish religion..." Mr. Reyes was Catholic before marriage, but converted to Judaism for his wife. The restraining Order was the result of Mr. Reyes' decision to baptize his daughter in the Catholic Church -- an event he documented and sent pictures of to his wife. After the Order was entered, Mr. Reyes decided to take his daughter to Catholic Church, after, of course, calling a local news station to memorialize the occasion. As with many issues in family law cases, it's difficult to tell if the issue of religion is truly important to Mr. Reyes, or whether he is simply looking for media attention and/or to anger his wife.

Because Mr. Reyes would be unable to undo his actions, and thus "purge" himself of civil contempt, the issue is criminal contempt. The Judge could (but it is very unlikely) sentence him to up to six months in jail. Judge Jordan's courtroom, as usual, will be very interesting when this case is heard.

Divorce Communication Website: All About the Children

Even if you haven't been through a divorce, you know someone who has. Or you know someone who has a child with someone that they are separated from or have never been married to. Thus, odds are you know just how difficult joint parenting can be. Not only do you have to communicate with someone who you have chosen to no longer live with...you have to do it effectively so as to best benefit your children. Your relationship as parents is ongoing...and until your children are all emancipated, you will have to deal with issues such as visitation, altering visitation, school schedules, extracurricular activity schedules, holidays, not to mention everyone's favorite: money issues.

All About the Children is a new tool that can help parents....well, co-parent. If both parents sign up and have accounts, both parents can then view their child's schedule via the calendar, communicate with the other parent about other issues such as visitation via the mail room, and even manage finances via money matters. Money matters will even handle direct deposits from one parent's account into the other parent's account for miscellaneous expenses and even child support. Parents are emailed each time something happens on his or her account. All transactions are date-stamped when they are sent and when they are received and cannot be altered.

As an attorney dealing with parents attempting to find the best way to work together, or any way to work together after their relationship has ended, this website seems like an invaluable tool. And as a Guardian ad Litem, I have been appointed by the Court to investigate what I believe to be in the best interests of a child or children...and oftentimes have been faced with parents who argue that they cannot contact the other parent because his or her voicemail box is full...or they do not return voicemails...or that they refuse to communicate via any method other than text...or that they send constant emails expecting an immediate response...the list goes on. This website attempts to address those communication issues and presents a central hub where parents can go to address the many issues involving their children's lives.

Check it out -- and let us know what you think: http://www.allaboutthechildren.us/.

Grandparents: How to Help in Divorce

Grandparents, whether directly or indirectly, are often involved in divorce cases and other custody disputes. Their child and grandchildren may come to live with them during or after a divorce for a period of time, or they may become a bigger part of their grandchildren's child care due to decreased finances. Even if the involvement is the same as before the divorce came about, grandparents are still impacted by the new situation. One piece of advice? Don't take sides! Grandparents will naturally "side" with their child if a divorce becomes antagonistic. But this can be detrimental to the children; a child loves both of his or her parents, and will be taken aback if they hear their grandparent say something derogatory about either parent. It's hard for a child to trust someone who says terrible things about a parent. Children are smart and observant, and do not easily forget what they hear. A grandparent should learn to bite his or her tongue and hold back any vilifying comments, even if there is a good reason to be angry, no matter how difficult it may be.


If a grandparent does talk negatively about the other parent, before, during or after a divorce, time with their grandchildren may be dimished as a result. If you are a mother, and you know your mother-in law (or former mother-in-law) constantly talks trash about you, would you want your children spending time with her? Probably not. What about the annual week-long trip to the beach that your mother-in-law took your children on? Not gonna happen this year -- a week of listening to how horrible of a parent I am? I don't think so! Keeping quiet keeps your grandchildren close. And if a child asks or wants to talk about the divorce or dispute, or if a grandparent feels the need to say something about the situation, simply saying that the divorce is no one's fault, including the child's for example, might help.

Grandparents are in a unique situation during divorce. Both their granchildren and their children will lean on them during the process and grandparents have the ability to diminish the trauma, or contribute. Our firm has dealt with enough cases involving grandparents, divorce and visitation and I can tell you that if the grandparents put aside their feelings about the other parent and instead focus on the thing everyone has in common: love for the children, all parties will benefit.

Think Before Hitting Send:Text Messages Can Be Dangerous in Divorce!

Let's be honest. We've all read the US Weekly that details Tiger's racy texts to members of the opposite sex that just happened to not be his wife. Do you think that the second Tiger tapped out those messages on his PDA he thought they would be emblazoned in the pages of every gossip magazine for weeks? Not hardly. I doubt that Nevada Governor Jim Gibbons thought too hard, either, before sending the -- alleged -- 860 text messages to paramours on a state cell phone, either. I doubt many people think too hard before sending a text. Unfortunately, this lack of thought is coming back to bite many litigants in divorces.

The February issue of the Matrimonial Strategist discusses the issue of text messages ("Text Messages Providing TMI for Divorce Lawyers") and interviews one New York attorney who recalled the past, when he would hire private investigators to "burst into hotel rooms to catch cheating spouses." Now? Simply pick up your spouse's cell phone or PDA. If it's there, you'll find what you're looking for. And even if you can't find it, your attorney can send a subpoena to your spouse's cell provider and the text messages from the requested time period will be produced. And it works both ways.

The bottom line? Think before you type. Think before you text. Maybe even think before you speak. If it can happen to Tiger, it can happen to anyone.